how to find a third

Guri Bee

2 min read

·

18-10-2024

1

0

Share

Finding Your Third: A Guide to Triangular Relationships

Finding your "third" might sound unconventional, but in the realm of polyamory, it refers to navigating a relationship dynamic involving three individuals. This article aims to demystify the process of finding a third, offering guidance and insights from real-life experiences shared on GitHub.

What is a Triangular Relationship?

A triangular relationship, often referred to as a "triad," involves three individuals who are in a romantic or intimate relationship with each other. These relationships can take various forms, with varying levels of intimacy and commitment between each person.

Is it right for me?

Before embarking on a journey to find a third, it's crucial to honestly assess whether this type of relationship aligns with your values and desires.

Key Considerations:

• Communication: Open, honest, and consistent communication is paramount in any polyamorous relationship.
• Boundaries: Clear, mutually agreed upon boundaries are essential for maintaining healthy dynamics.
• Trust: Building trust is fundamental, especially when navigating complex emotional landscapes.
• Consent: Every decision and action must be consensual and respectful.

How to Find a Third:

1. Introspection and Self-Discovery:

• What are your needs and desires? Consider what you seek in a partner and the type of relationship you envision.
• Are you ready for the challenges of a polyamorous relationship? Polyamory requires dedication, communication, and a willingness to navigate complexities.

2. Finding the Right Community:

• Connect with other polyamorous individuals: Online platforms like Reddit, Facebook groups, and dating apps specifically designed for polyamorous individuals can provide a safe space to connect.
• Attend local polyamory events: Many cities have meetups, workshops, and social gatherings for polyamorous individuals.

3. Taking the First Step:

• Be clear and upfront about your intentions: Openly communicate your desire for a third.
• Honesty and transparency: Be truthful about your relationship status, needs, and boundaries.

Real-life Examples from GitHub:

Example 1:

• Author: u/polycurious_person
• Comment: "I'm new to polyamory, but I'm looking for a third who enjoys board games and hiking. Is there anyone else out there looking for a similar dynamic?"

Analysis: This user clearly expresses their intentions and interests, creating a foundation for potential connections.

Example 2:

• Author: u/poly_explorer
• Comment: "I'm in a loving, established couple, and we're open to finding a third to join us. We're looking for someone who values open communication and is comfortable with non-monogamy."

Analysis: This example emphasizes the importance of establishing clear expectations and defining desired qualities in a potential partner.

Finding the Right Fit:

• Take your time: Finding a compatible third is a journey, so don't rush the process.
• Trust your intuition: Pay attention to your gut feelings and how you feel in their presence.
• Be patient and respectful: It takes time to build trust and understanding.

Conclusion:

Finding your third is an exciting and potentially fulfilling journey. By approaching it with open communication, clear boundaries, and a willingness to learn and grow, you can create a dynamic and enriching relationship that honors your unique desires. Remember, navigating any relationship, especially a polyamorous one, requires effort, compassion, and a shared commitment to creating a space of love, respect, and understanding.